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This task takes practice and can be like touching a hot coal. It hurts. We get close to sensing what the other must be going through, and like the coal, we drop it and run in the other direction of the pain.

Be gentle with yourself and allow yourself patience because this task is very difficult

Set aside a time and a safe space and allow yourself to imagine what it feels like to go through life as your loved one. With their diagnosis, what must they be feeling? Sad, frustrated, alone… why?

As your awareness of these feelings start coming to the surface you might find yourself reaching out to grasp them, but pulling back (like from the coal). This is only natural. Remember, be gentle and patient.

Like a muscle, your ability to do this task will strengthen with time. And remember the more you take care of yourself the stronger the muscle becomes.


So, now what?

There is so much we can do when it comes to the relationships in our lives. In fact, we’re only scratching the surface here. That’s why BMB is in the process of putting together some special e-Books that dive deeper into the emotional challenges of relationships, with more on how to improve them so that you can be a strong source of support and continue to manage your own stress!

“Becoming a Source of Calm” is the title of our second e-Book, which is designed specifically for you – the family member, friend, or care provider of someone living with any kind of disease or disability. In this e-Book you will learn…

How to calm your loved one when you feel like there’s nothing you can do

Ways to remain calm in a state of panic

Signs that you need to take care of yourself – and how

Talking points for difficult situations